A 3-way Stud Quarterback Shootout…A tie on the top of the Running Back heap…Don’t write off the Rod…Who is that guy?…Defensive Tie-Breakers…T&A Mayhem…Yes…I chumped it up…Chump Survivor…and another Major Milestone…all in this week’s edition…

Tom Brady (BAT)

3 Quarterbacks cracked the 30 point plateau (not counting Cam on the Bubba Bench…) and for the 1st time all season it is the 3 1st Round Draft Picks on the top of the pack…Brees and Rodgers faced off against each other…Brees 1st touchdown pass to Colston (also on the Bubba Bench…) tied him with Johnny U’s 52 year old record at 47 Consecutive Games with a TD…Brees managed the most yardage on the day (446)…but Android had the better QB Rating (119.9 vs 109.0) and most touchdowns (4) including the game winner…While those 2 titans laid haymakers on each other…The Dreamiest Quarterback in the Universe® worked his magic on the Hurricanes defense…His “routine” 22 of 36 for 340 yards and 3 Touchdowns proved to be the most efficient earning him the highest QB Rating in the group (120.1)…but it was surprising footwork from Brady…he rushed for only his 11th touchdown in his 11 year career…that gave him the 1 point edge over Brees (34) and secured him his 1st Player of the Week award since Week 2 of 2011…It is the 1st award for Bay Area Thrashers on the year…and our 4th Quarterback…in 4 weeks…from a 4th different team…

Michael Turner (PLA)

The Legends camp were caught looking past this week as they tried to stay ahead of mathematical elimination from their Guaranteed 10 Win Season (Magic Elimination # is now 1)…Michael Turner definitely pulled his weight in that losing effort gaining 103 yards on 13 carries in the dirt against the Fudgie Whales defense…Along with his 6 1st Downs…he hauled in 3 of his 5 targets for an additional 68 yards and a touchdown in the air capping out at 25 points…While Warriors failed to stop their backward slide to 102 TBFL losses…Willis McGahee managed to tie the 25 points…literally earning 1 point per touch…he went 112 yards on 19 carries including a 2 yard end zone plunge…then added 23 more yards after being force fed the ball 6 more times in the air…With the higher yards per carry (7.9 vs 5.9)…yards per catch (22.6 vs 3.8)…and yards from scrimmage (171 vs 135) Turner takes the trophy in Week 4…his 1st on the year and the 3rd for the Playground Legends…

Roddy White (AND)

Julio Who?…Preseason prognosticators said this was the year Julio Jones would take over the primary role in Atlanta and Roddy White would start seeing his decline…1 problem…they forgot to tell Roddy…There was no competition from anyone else at this position in Week 4…White pulled in 8 of his 12 targets (66.7%) for 169 yards…it would have been 170 if not for a 2nd Quarter completion where Luke Kuechley caught him for a 1 yard loss…It proved to be his only unproductive touch on the day…he tallied up 5 1st Downs and 2 Touchdowns with his other 7 catches…he totals out at 36 points…the #1 score of all starters on the weekend…it is the 1st Player of the Week award for Roddy and the 3rd on the year for Armed N Dangerous…

Greg Zuerlein (AND)

Greg Who?…Seriously…which of you heard of this guy before this year?…Did you know he set the NCAA Division II record with 21 consecutive Field Goals made…including 9 over 50 yards?…In the past 2 Weeks he has set 3 more records…his 56 yard shot in Week 3 is the longest ever made at Soldier Field…This week he broke Jeff Wilkins 14 year old Rams record of 57 yards with a 58 yarder in the 1st Quarter…Then he broke his own record with a 60 yard blast in the 3rd Quarter…The 2 long distance bonus points…1 Extra Point…and staying perfect on 2 more less exciting kicks made 15 and takes the Kicker of the Week trophy…his 1st on the year…but if he gets to keep kicking in the dome…probably not his last…it is the 4th trophy for Armed N Dangerous who are now only a Running Back award away from hitting for the cycle…

Houston Texans (FUD)

With the #1 Defense on the weekend sitting on Hurricanes bench (San Francisco 49ers 34 points)…we had a dog fight between 2 teams to see who would take the Week 4 trophy home…Fudgie Whales Texans unit made quick work of starting QB Jake Locker…sacking him out of the game after 2 incompletions…they then harassed #2 QB Hasselbeck with 3 more Sacks…1 Forced Fumble…and 2 Pick-6 Interceptions that went back for a combined 118 yards…14 points allowed gave them 1 more bonus point to total out at 23…UO Grandmasters Chicago Bears squad managed to tie the 23 on Monday Night…They corralled DeMarco Murray and company to only 41 yards allowed on the ground…they made Tony Romo look like a rookie getting 1 Sack and picking him off 5 times including 2 Pick-6 trips of their own…With fewer yards allowed (325 vs 430)…fewer points allowed (14 vs 18)…and hitting on 2 more scoring events (No Score Bonus or FR for CHI)…the award goes to the Texans…it is their 1st trophy on the year and the 1st for Fudgie Whales…

Team of the Week

That is how you win on Tits & Ammo Night…2 Player of the Week winners…a 2nd place Quarterback…and 3 of the Top 5 Wide Receivers on the weekend…The -2 earned by their New York Jets Defense was the only blemish on the roster and kept Armed N Dangerous DOWN to 160 points…it ties as the 13th highest score in league history…and also ties the team record set in the Semi-Finals of the 2009 Playoffs on the way to winning their 2nd TBFL Championship…the 82 point victory over Runs N Throses ties for the 16th largest Victory Margin of all time…it is the 2nd time Shawn has made the wrong side of this record in the last 3 weeks…in which The Throsers have played the Team of the Week 3 times in a row…my quickie research can not find any other instance of that happening before…but I will keep digging…to add insult to injury…CJNOWAY’s problems may have been with Shawn’s coaching style…In 3 games he only managed 45 yards on 33 carries (1.36 ypc)…On Thursday he was traded for Andy Dalton…picked up in Miller’s private jet…and after 72 hours of non-stop Viagra…Titties…Beer…and an unlimited supply of ammunition…he managed to out run the entire league tallying up 141 yards on 21 carries (6.71 ypc) for Armed N Dangerous…It is AND’s 1st Team of the Week award on the season and the 19th in their history…

Chump of the Week

I could dwell…on how the TE who had averaged 10+ targets a game…managed to play in 62 of 87 offensive snaps (71.3%) on Thursday Night…and only got 2 looks…or how the big fat 0 that left on my roster…made me decide not to risk starting Cam against a Defense that was only allowing 14.2 points per game to opposing Fantasy Quarterbacks…or how I flip flopped between Jackson or Moore…while Amendola and Colston buried both of their scores from my bench…or how another TE that had averaged 7 targets and a Touchdown every week…also managed to disappear on Sunday Night…I could…but I won’t…no more than that any way…I ate one here…I 2nd guessed myself into getting less than ½ of my 144 potential points…If I miss out on the playoffs…or winning my Division on a tie-break…this game will be why…X-Factor got a gift in my mind…[end of bitter pill]…

Chump Survivor

With the Chump of the Week award earned…Yours truly becomes the 2nd former Team of the Week to fall out of the Chump Survivor game…Average scoring in the league rose to 107.3…but only 4 teams still alive in the contest made it North of that mark…Playground Legends…Runs N Throses…and X-Factor will all need to step it up to get off the bottom of the list in Week 5…

Milestones

Bay Area Thrashers remain undefeated in their 5 meetings with Hurricanes…The Week 4 win snaps Hurricanes winning streak at 8 games…and is Thrasher’s 100th TBFL Victory…they are only the 3rd team to reach the mark…and by doing it in 176 games played are the 2nd fastest to reach it (RNT 172)…

X-Factor has started the season on a 4 game win streak (GIFT!)…tied for 8th longest to open a season…they are now in control of the Buccaneers Division for the 1st time since Week 2 of 2010…

Armed N Dangerous and Bay Area Thrashers are both on 3 game win streaks…while Runs N Throses…Husslers…and Warriors are on 3 game slides…

Warrior’s streak sets the new high bar for TBFL losses at 102…They are 5 losses away from 100 Regular Season Game misfires…